by Eddie Pipkin

Image by Tomek from Pixabay

In last week’s episode of Ted Lasso, titled “Yes & Baby,” the comedic soccer crew explored the concept of, you guessed it, “Yes . . . And.”  It’s a key component of improvisational theater, and it’s become a favorite of leadership strategists and coaches.  It’s also closely related to the theological ethos of United Methodist Church, represented as “Both/And.”  YES, the show’s funny but effective demonstration of the power of this principle was a great reminder of the way this compounding response can propel us in new and useful directions, AND it’s a great demonstration of how such an approach can promote teamwork, creativity, and flexibility.

In the streaming show, a new character, the chilly, prickly women’s soccer coach, Alice Chilton, has struggled to connect with the team.  She’s trying to improve her outlook and has listened to a self-help coach who has sold her on the attitude-changing approach of “saying yes” to everything.  Coach Chilton embraces this advice with hysterical results, as she responds “Yes!” to everything everyone asks her, no matter how improbable.

Of course, chaos ensues.  You can’t say “Yes!” to everything can you?  Even if you want to have a general, positive attitude responding positively whenever and however possible, a blanket policy of blind affirmery will inevitably lead to disaster.

That’s why head coach Ted Lasso and assistant coach Beard introduce her to the adjusted concept of “Yes . . . And,” which they apparently picked up in a mandatory team-building comedy improvisation class. It turns out that – and this is historically accurate – the concept of “Yes . . . And” began in the emerging improvisational comedy circuits of Chicago in the 1950s, and it is gospel among improvisational amateurs and professionals.  The foundational principle is to embrace the premise of your partner and then build upon it with an idea of your own.  If you can do this consistently with enthusiasm and confidence, it’s great for teams and organizations:

  • It builds creativity and flexibility.
  • It builds trust.
  • It affirms the contributions and insights of all team members.
  • It promotes forward momentum.
  • It requires compromise, while leaving room for growth.
  • It pushes us to expand our horizons, thrusting us into uncomfortable territory while still giving us a degree of input and control over what happens next.

If we start out with “Yes . . . And” as a named goal for how our team will function, we have already established that there will be no leadership tyrants.  We’ll be working together and deferring to one another for ideas.  Collaboration has already been identified as a core value.

It’s perhaps easier to see how effectively “Yes . . . And” can work by thinking about its antithesis, the non-collaborative practice of “No . . . But.”  If someone comes up with an idea, and our immediate response is “No . . . but we can do THIS instead,” we create several negative effects:

  • We demean and discount the contributions of others.
  • We clearly signal that our idea, approach, or perspective is more valuable.
  • We undercut momentum while we’re killing the vibe.
  • We shift the discussion to defensiveness and argument by listing obstacles rather than exploring possibilities.

A general approach of “Yes . . . And” when practicable, prudent, and safe is a strong approach.  If we can say “yes” – unless there is some very good reason to say “no” – if we made that our default starting point, we can only imagine the possibilities.

This isn’t a cure-all, but it’s yet another good way to think about how we make decisions and what our day-to-day management attitude is.  Some of us are negative Nellies (like coach Chilton in the show), and focusing on the “yes” may be the change we need.  Others may already be way too comfortable saying “yes,” and need to instead leaven their green light signaling by applying the brakes a little more frequently.  The key is to know how we are wired, how our teammates are wired, and how our organizations are wired, so that we can shift accordingly if we’re stuck too far on one side of the spectrum or the other.  (I could just as easily have written a blog post on the power of saying no. Some leaders and local churches need that kernel of wisdom instead!)

I find it interesting how the “Yes . . . And” approach favored by comedians and leadership coaches parallels the “Both/And” emphasis of the United Methodist Church.  From an interview with Rev. Lisa Yebuah on the UM website, we have these words:

Let’s get back to the image of God. Here’s what I also believe to be true — it’s hard to have an imagination for God without a BOTH/AND, even if it’s difficult to fathom.

Now there are some things about the character of God that are unchanging: God is good. Hard stop. God is merciful. Hard stop. God is love. Hard stop.

AND God comes with might and also with gentleness. AND God speaks in a whisper and also like with a voice of thunder. AND God is like a mother hen drawing us near and also has the power to make mountains quake.

Faith in God requires making space for God.

It’s a useful concept: two things can be true at once.  The world doesn’t have to be composed of binary choices, my way or the highway.

Both/And honors a diversity of approaches, and “Yes . . . And” gives teams a runway to put that diversity of approaches into practice.

What are some examples in which you have seen this philosophy at work on your leadership teams?  What are the potential dangers and pitfalls?  Share your stories!